1 - Welcome to Matthew’s Blog
You may be, like me, stunned by the news. Matthew was a beloved son, brother, friend… scheduled to stand proudly for his brother’s joyously anticipated wedding within a few short weeks. Nick and Colleen Sanden are amazing people - givers, lovers, and proud parents. We can only begin to know something of their sense of loss. This space is created as a place for you to post your thoughts.
The Memorial Service in Idyllwild was amazing. The little mountain church was packed. Pastor Tim brought a powerful sense of God’s presence and mercy. Love overflowed… as did the tears. It was a beautiful tribute to Matthew’s life, and a celebration of the gift he was to so many. It was also a celebration of hope.
Comments are coming in now, from those who attended. Please join them.
Click in Photo for Full Image
Please leave a comment. It will be read by Matthew’s family and friends. You may leave a comment anytime… or you can send an e-mail to me… I will post your thoughts as quickly as I can. You should know that the stock photo of the golfer on the top of the blog is not Matthew, though it might easily have been. It’s there temporarily until I can get a current photo… maybe you’ll be the one to pass it along.
The details of the planned memorial are spelled out in Nick and Colleen’s post.
If you would like to send a card or letter to the Sandens, please send it c/o the church:
Nick and Colleen Sanden
c/o Idyllwild Bible Chuch
PO Box 1029
Idyllwild, CA 92549
Join us continued prayer for the family. Your comments and thoughts will be cherished.
Ken Kemp, long time friend of the family
I have known the Sanden faimily for 33 years…before the boys became their great joy….I remember praying for Matthew when he was born with a hole in his lung…They brought him home, and for 29 years he has been a blessing to all who knew him..This sudden illsness stunned all of us, and then God took Matthew home…What we DO know, however is that God is perfect, and in His great mercy Matthew’s struggle is over..He is singing with the angels and giving His Lord glory and praise…Our human perspective is so limited…I will always miss you Matthew; your beautiful smile, your gentle spirit, your sense of humor…how very special you will always be to me…thank you for being my friend and always letting me know how much you cared…
Nick and Colleen and Michael…You are so close to my heart, and I can never know how difficult this is…but I will always pray for God’s continued healing …and thank Him for who you are in HIM………..I love you, Linda
Thank you so much, Ken, for contacting me and others to let us know about this wonderful online space devoted to Matthew. What a lovely way to share and celebrate his life and memory.
I have been so stunned at the news of what seemed like such a sudden and premature end to my young cousin’s life. It is extremely hard for me to wrap my head around his death, as I’m sure is the case for everyone. It just seems impossible, somehow.
One thing I know for sure is that everything happens for a reason, and in this case that reason is very far beyond my comprehension. It doesn’t seem at all fair to lose such a young and lovely man. I wish I had more time to get to know him better. We saw each other over the years so occasionally, and he always had a nice manner about him and a good spirit.
Matthew now knows a lot more than all of us about the nature of life and death. He will remain with us all in memory and spirit, and we will treasure his 29 years.
I send Much Love to you, Dearest Nick, Colleen and Michael, during this extremely difficult time. May you find strength, purpose, understanding, and peace. Know that you are in the thoughts of all of the Cotters.
Love,
Mary Ann
Dear Nick, Colleen and Mike,
“Precious in the sight of the Lord is the death of His saints.”
“But I will see you again and you will rejoice, and no one will take away your joy.”
John 16:22
I am sure the mystery of being sorrowful yet rejoicing describes your hearts and thoughts these days. Remembering what a friend said in the face of death one day .. We are not ready to live until we are ready to die. Matt was ready in both accounts. Do you know Linda and Roy Crandall? They are long time friends who lost their son in a motorcycle accident when he was 22 – and Linda said many months later … “You know … even if God answered the question … Why? It wouldn’t be good enough!” There is nothing that spans the gap of the loss of presence. We know of your wonderful family and the incredible support of friends far and wide – but in those silent moments alone it is our prayer that the God of all comfort will meet your every question, tear, and angst with the memories and moments of a lifetime with your beloved Matt. We have always felt privileged to be your friends as we have shared in love our lives in Christ. We love you so much. Hyatt & Jeanne Baker
Dear Nick and Colleen
I woke up early this morning and could not go back to sleep. I was thinking of Matt and as I lied in bed staring up with tears in my eyes, my thoughts went back 19 years ago to a Sunday school class room at the Idyllwild Bible Church. I remember the room full of young people and a fun loving young man with a beautiful grin who loved to play soccer. I remember times when we would take the kids out and how Matt would clown around always with that grin. I remember teaching Matt and his classmates Ephesians 2:8,
“For it is by grace you have been saved through faith, and this not from yourselves,………It is the gift of God, not of works so that no one can boast.”
I clearly remember how easy it was for Matt to remember verses we taught. I wish I could go back to that time and sit out on the grass again talk with Matt and run and play soccer with him and his classmates. I remember a father’s day celebration two or three years ago I believe, when Matt and Michael came up to Idyllwild to honor their Dad. I remember talking with Matt afterwards and him telling me how he would never forget Psalms 1:1-6 a verse I was able to teach him and one he told me he would never forget. He then recounted the verse for me.
1 Blessed is the man
who does not walk in the counsel of the wicked
or stand in the way of sinners
or sit in the seat of mockers.
2 But his delight is in the law of the LORD,
and on his law he meditates day and night.
3 He is like a tree planted by streams of water,
which yields its fruit in season
and whose leaf does not wither.
Whatever he does prospers………………………………….
Matt went on from that time and classroom and he and I lost touch with each other which is so common with Sunday school teachers and students. I am however grateful to God for the time I had with Matt. I am thankful for Nick and Colleen who so loved their son and who raised him and brought him to church every Sunday. I thank God for the gift of Matt’s life.
I want to briefly encourage all who read this, to invest in the life of a young person like Matt. Share your time, energy and love for young people who need to know God’s love and plan for their lives. It won’t be easy, they’ll giggle, squirm, talk out of turn, act up and generally be kids, but I promise that the privilege of teaching and getting to know one who is created in the image of God will bring great reward. Matt did all this for me 19 years ago.
I love you Matt and can’t wait to see that beautiful grin of yours on the day the Lord takes me home.
Wayne Clark
To our Dear Friends…Nick, Colleen, Mickey,
We cannot begin to describe our sadness and grief over the loss of your precious Matthew. And we cannot even imagine the depth of your grief. We so wish we could be there to weep with you and to hold you close. We do, however, know that GOD is holding you close in His loving arms, and for that we are so grateful.
Beth wrote Jana the words of the Steven Curtis Chapman song, With Hope. Jim found it on CCLI and bought it on i-tunes. We have listened to it over and over and over…we weep every time we hear the words and think of your incredible loss.
We rejoice that Matthew is with Jesus, that he is whole and well, that he is free from pain. We weep with you, Nick, Colleen, Mickey and Melissa. We pray Rom. 15:13 for you…May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.
We love you,
Jan and Jim
With Hope
This is not at all how
We thought it was supposed to be
We had so many plans for you
We had so many dreams
And now you’ve gone away
And left us with the memories of your smile
And nothing we can say
And nothing we can do
Can take away the pain
The pain of losing you, but …
We can cry with hope
We can say goodbye with hope
‘Cause we know our goodbye is not the end
And we can grieve with hope
‘Cause we believe with hope
There’s a place where we’ll see your face again
We’ll see your face again
And never have I known
Anything so hard to understand
And never have I questioned more
The wisdom of God’s plan
But through the cloud of tears
I see the Father’s smile and say well done
And I imagine you
Where you wanted most to be
Seeing all your dreams come true
‘Cause now you’re home
And now you’re free, and …
We have this hope as an anchor
‘Cause we believe that everything
God promised us is true, so …
So we can cry with hope
And say goodbye with hope
We wait with hope
And we ache with hope
We hold on with hope
We let go with hope
Steven Curtis Chapman
Dear Colleen and Family,
If I tried to say much, I’m sure it would be wrong, but know that I am thinking of you all and lifting you up in prayer.
Under the Mercy,
Deb
Dear Nick, Colleen and Mike
I am so sad for the loss of Matthew. He will be greatly missed. I spent many hours on the beach with Colleen talking about our children. I learned Matthew had a great sense of humor and was well liked. He was very special to all that knew him. You are in our thoughts and prayers. You have a wonderful family, great friends and a strong relationship with God to help you through this very hard time. We love you.
Anne and Roger Pieper
Dear Nick and Colleen and Mike,
We love you dearly. We try to put ourselves in your place. We try to feel what it would be like to lose a child or a brother. It just doesn’t work. Only God knows what you are going through and only God can provide what you need right now and in the days ahead. We know that He already is providing because that is who He is. Without Him it would be hopeless. Because of His great love and grace we are confident that you will come through this, the most difficult of times.
How can we ease your pain? Our words fall far short. The emotion of grief and the experience of grieving is not common to any of us. It’s a part of life that we would all like to skip. But without these deep emotions how would we know the depths of God’s love and his provision. Many verses will probably take on new meaning during this time, like Psalm 91. Where else can we go but to the Lord when our heart or mind takes us to a dark place.
“He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the Lord, ‘He is my refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust.’ He will cover you with his feathers, and under his wings you will find refuge; his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart.”
We will continue to do battle with you and for you in prayer. We know the enemy wants to use this time to disrupt, discourage, dishearten and even destroy. Our prayer is that he will not find a foothold anywhere. We are also praying that the Memorial Service on Saturday will be a great testimony to the grace and love of our God and that it will touch any and all hearts that are far from him and bring them close to Him.
We celebrate Matt’s home going and grieve with you as you miss him.
All our love,
Robin & Karen Wood
As a fellow student, Matt was one of the people I most looked forward to seeing everyday at the San Diego Golf Academy. I enjoyed his good nature and friendship. I will miss him.
I wish his family God’s peace and joyful memories of a very special son and brother.
Dear Nick, Colleen & Mike,
At a time like this we seek Gods counsel to tell us what words of comfort can we mere mortals possibly convey that God has put on our hearts. Over & over as I remembered Mathews beautiful smile & how wonderful you all are, he said please tell them I think so too & love them very much. In Mathews life that smile of his reflected the love of God to all who knew him. You all have touched so many peoples lives with your love & care, I count it a privilege to have been one of them.
Mathew was Gods gift to so many. He was heaven’s custom design. He was born prepacked, God looked at his entire life, determined his assignment & gave him the tools to be who he was meant to be in life. “Before I made you in your mother’s womb, I chose you. Before you were born, I set you apart for a special work.” Jeremiah 1:5
He could do things no one else could do in a fashion no one else could do it. Mathew was, without a doubt, “Fearfully & wonderfully made”. Psalm 139:14
With all my love in Christ,
Diane (Rice) Guidry
Growing up I always thought Matt and Mikey were the two coolest kids in Idyllwild. I remember tagging along with my older brother Josh when he’d hang out with Matt. I even followed the Sanden boys to Hume Lake thinking “if these two think Hume is cool than it must be.”
My thoughts and prayers are with the Sanden’s. I hope you feel support as I have always felt supported by you.
Love and glory to God.
Jared
In thinking back on all the time that I spent with Matt, Mikey, Nick, & Colleen growing up, the word “adventure” comes to mind. Matt had an adventurous soul and spirit, one that pushed us to the top of San Gorgonio Peak, one that drove us to fish every hour of the day just to see who could cathc the biggest and the most.
Matt and I shared a love for God’s great outdoors and all the incredible things we could see and do in them. Now Matt is on a new adventure, the greatest of all. But in the mean time, he will be missed. Our hearts and prayers are with you Sanden family. We love you.
Matt was loved and this has always been so evident. And today was no different, as many people came to honor him at his memorial service. From his elementary teachers and childhood friends to church family and of course his amazingly loving family. People from all over…who all have memories of Matt. When I think about the memories I have of Matt I can’t help but feel blessed. Blessed to have shared laughter and tears with him and his family. Blessed to have gone on family trips together, summer camp at Hume, prom (and that was funny), and many more.
Nick, Colleen and Mikey…you have always and will always be such dear people to me. Your example of Christ in how you live your lives is so evident…and shone clearly even today in the midst of such great loss. You are in my prayers and will remain in my prayers. I love you each so much! Thank you for the memories of Matt and your family.
It is interesting that every memory I have of Matt includes Michael. My family moved to Idyllwild and started attending IBC when I was in 8th grade. Nick and Colleen were my youth leaders and I adored them and their family. I loved babysitting for the boys. They were always so happy and fun to be around. Matt was the one that got into mischief and Michael tagged along. Whether it was playing hide and seek or reading them a story I loved getting to hang out with them.
When I was in high school I was asked to teach a Sunday School class. Matthew, Michael, Jessica and Ryan were in my class. I knew I wanted to be a teacher and I loved preparing for these lessons. As I recall, Matt always had his hand raised with the answer and loved to ask me tough questions, like “but WHY did that happen?” He definitely kept me on my toes!
The last time I really got to hang out with Matthew and Michael was the day before I got married, 16 years ago. I knew I was marrying the right guy because the Sanden family, especially Matt and Michael, liked and accepted Rich, and the boys even included him in their games of basketball.
I am so very grateful that Rich and I could be at Matt’s service yesterday. What a beautiful remembrance of an incredible young man. I grieve with Nick, Colleen, and Michael at the loss of Matt. I am also humbled that they have allowed me to enter into their pain as they begin living with this devastating loss.
Dear Sanden Family
It has been over ten years since I’ve seen or spoken to Matt – probably the last time I saw him was at our high school graduation – but I heard of his life and what he was doing through my mother who spoke often with Colleen. I was completely shocked to hear of Matt’s passing and have thought of him frequently since I heard the sad news. My entire family was together this weekend and spent some precious time remembering Matt and the fun times we had during soccer games/practices. My deepest condolences to your family… now that I am a parent of a precious baby boy I can’t even fathom the loss and pain you must be experiencing. It is so comforting; however, to hear of your deep and utter devotion to your family and to God.
You are in my thoughts and prayers…always.
Becky (Pimentel) Teague
Dear Nick, Colleen, and Mike,
What a joy for us to attend the Memorial Service for Matt last Saturday. Sometimes, it is very difficult for us to understand the ways of the Lord. But that is why He is God. In the midst of all of this sorrow, somehow through the memorial service, you were able to fortify our faith in our Heavenly Father. Thank you for that. Please know that we will continue to pray for you, that the Lord would comfort your heart, and see you through this most difficult time.
Our Pastor often talks of “faithing” in our Heavenly Father. This is difficult to do when we do not understand. But the One that knew us before the foundation of the universe knows what is best. He loves us more than we can ever understand. Matt is at peace, he is singing with the Lord and the heavenly angels. Due to the Lord for choosing each of us, someday we will all be able to join Matt in Heaven. Thank you for the encouragement that you are. May He continue to bless each of you richly,
Much love,
DeWitt & Linda Russell